Ditching New Year’s Resolutions

First things first, Happy New Year! I’m a little late to the party but better late than not at all!

February is just around the corner but I was wondering, did you make any New Year’s resolutions this year? How’s it been going so far?

Did you know, and I’m sorry to be the bearer of bad news, but according to evidence, around 80% of resolutions are doomed to fail? It’s not so much if, but when, and most research indicates that we tend to throw in the towel by early - mid February i.e. just around the corner…

So what makes sticking to resolutions so difficult? On one hand, our goals might not be entirely realistic: “I’m finally going to run a marathon this year!”

On the other hand the obvious, but often overlooked, truth: A resolution isn’t a fast-track or magic bullet to success. When we set a resolution, we’re actually embarking on the arduous and patience-testing journey that is forging a new habit. 

Essentially, habit formation is a quite different proposition to “that thing we’ve been aspiring to but haven’t quite got round to yet”. Sustainable behaviour change takes time and the journey requires motivation, resourcefulness, support, accountability… the list goes on. Dare I say it, it might even require coaching. Thankfully, I’m here to support you and below are a few tips and tricks to help ensure meaningful lifestyle change, whatever your ambitions may be.

Quick tips for success:

1. Make A Plan

When first setting a goal, it’s important to hone in on the specifics, like how to hold ourselves accountable, when we will fit it in day-to-day, and knowing when or what our deadline is. Not only that, to stay on task, we need feedback along the way to maintain motivation. Who can supply this? They simply need to be someone we can trust to give compassionate and honest feedback to keep us accountable on our quest.

“All big things come from small beginnings. The seed of every habit is a single, tiny decision.” - James Clear, Atomic Habits

2. Track Progress

This may seem obvious, but the more often, the better. A 2016 meta-analysis published by the American Psychological Association (APA) suggests that people who track their progress when striving toward personal health goals—like losing weight, quitting smoking, changing their diets, or lowering blood pressure—are more likely to achieve them. So, if that half-marathon is beckoning, consider joining a running group where you can share your mile times as you keep training to help you cross the finish line.

3. Switch Up Motivational Tactics

Staying motivated is more than positive self-talk and searching out inspirational quotes on social media — it’s a science. And the science suggests we benefit from relying on a variety of motivational strategies while striving toward a goal; otherwise, we run the risk of losing interest. In a 2017 study in the Journal of Consumer Psychology, researchers explain that when we first set out to achieve a goal or forge a new habit, we are initially motivated by positive activities and behaviours we can adopt to make progress, like eating balanced meals if we’re trying to lose weight. This is known as promotion motivation. Then later down the line, once we’re closer to our desired results, we move to prevention motivation, which shifts the focus to steering clear of pitfalls, backsliding, and other behaviours that can prevent us from reaching our goal. According to the evidence, we can give ourselves a head start on our goals by incorporating promotion motivation strategies at the outset (going for consistent runs whilst working toward that half-marathon), identifying a point at which we’re close to our goal (like hitting a certain mile time, or being a few weeks out from the race), and then engaging in prevention motivation (e.g. skipping a late night on the town to be raring to go for a run the next morning).

“Motivation is what gets you started. Habit is what keeps you going.” - Jim Rohn

4. Focus on Approach (Not Avoidance)

While avoiding certain things and actions as we move closer to achieving a new goal or habit is beneficial, successful goals or habits themselves don’t focus on avoidant behaviours. It’s all in the ‘how’! Imagine this: You set an action step of running four times a week in preparation for a half-marathon. A friend and running buddy also wants to run the race, but their plan is to never miss a run in the lead-up to the event. The research suggests you’ll be more likely to cross the finish line because you focused on your approach rather than what not to do.

“Discipline is consistency of action.” - James C. Collins

5. Nurture Social Connections

Studies have repeatedly shown that the strength of our social support system is the greatest source of resilience, success, and happiness that we have. Particularly when we begin to lose sight of our goals, having a trusted someone to ‘light the way’ and remind us of our goals can reignite the necessary strength to get back in the game. By nurturing emotional connections through love and gratitude, we can then open ourselves up to receiving constructive feedback and support, both of which are essential motivators in goal setting and ultimately, habit formation. In particular, when it comes to health-related goals, ‘positive peer health norms’ are invaluable - Namely, throughout our lives our peers are the single biggest social factor in predicting our health behaviours.

“The people you surround yourself with influence your behaviors, so choose friends who have healthy habits.” - Dan Buettner

6. Trust, Patience and Compassion

Easier said than done obviously. However, exercising patience is perhaps one of the most important things we can do when in the process of habit formation. Most evidence agrees it can take anywhere from 18 to 254 days for a habit to truly take hold in our life, so when seeking instant gratification, it may be necessary to have a mindset reset along the lines of “slow and steady wins the race.” We don’t always see the results we want in the timeframe expected. A little self-compassion and trust in the process ensures that we are making a habit that will last.

"We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence, then, is not an act but a habit." - Will Durant

Also, remember you can change one thing at a time and that it doesn’t have to be all or nothing… small changes absolutely do count.

So if, like me, you didn’t make a new years resolution, or even if you did and you’re beginning to feel your resolve fading, it’s actually never too late to make a goal (or various goals) you will not only stick to, but achieve.